By Brenda Cannon Henley
We have looked at love, joy, peace, and now we come to long-suffering. It always amazes me that when I am writing in any sort of order or with a defined outline of subjects I want to cover, the Lord sees to it that I have plenty of material. He did not fail this time. Long-suffering has many meanings to many different people. Merriam Webster dictionary defines long-suffering as, “patiently enduring lasting offense or hardship.” Another resource book defines it as, “having or showing patience in spite of troubles, especially those caused by other people (his long-suffering wife).” Synonyms for long-suffering include forbearing, enduring, lenient, tolerant, and uncomplaining. Others added by different people include charitable, considerate, forgiving, gentle, going easy on, indulgent, merciful, moderate, patient, and thoughtful. Quite an order to be long-suffering, huh? It is the fourth fruit listed in our reference to Galatians 5:22, 23, and is often a tough one to swallow, much less live.

I like real life illustrations and don’t find it wrong to use them. Old, tired, dusty words usually don’t excite, direct, encourage, and help people as much as things lived out in real life in this day and age. A column is not a news article and does not have to follow the same standards and gives writers a bit more freedom to use personal stories that help to get the truth to the people reading the words. Jesus used parables often in the Bible to teach great truths. A parable, by the way, is an earthly story with a heavenly meaning.

While studying the subject of long-suffering, I was reminded vividly of this story that happened to me when I first started dating Ted, through our engagement period, and into the happy days following our wedding at sea aboard a wonderful cruise ship. He had been single for many years and had accumulated a larger than life black book. He was a handsome man, tall, dressed well, good vocabulary, traveled throughout his career, loved the outdoors and all water, and was kind. He was a fixer of things and of people. We never met a group of people that someone in that group did not feel Ted was their new best friend. He literally communicated with folks all over the world. That took a little getting used to on my part. I had never loved any male as much as I loved Ted and he loved me and I did not want anything to spoil the relationship.

A few years before I met him, he was visiting his sweet sister, Martha, who lived in Beaumont. She had a good friend whose husband had died and she needed an escort to a social event. Ted said he wasn’t too keen on the idea, but to please his beloved sister, he agreed to escort the woman for the weekend. Many family members would be present so he thought that he couldn’t be too bad. When the first evening’s activities ended, he escorted her to her hotel door and left. She had invited him in, but he declined.

He did his part to make the weekend go well and was simply her public escort. No hanky panky. He did feel that the two of them had much in common and he later told me she smothered him taking care of everyone and everything. She later married a man, but continued to call Ted and to send gifts from time to time. He clearly told Martha that there was no relationship, but Martha was caught in a bad place — between the brother she adored and a good friend of many years.

We had been dating several months and I could see us together forever, but the calls kept coming and I was aware of them. Many happened in my presence and Ted had a system in the truth where the telephone rang and the conversation took place for all to hear. Finally, one day, I felt we should talk about the matter. I told Ted if he didn’t handle it, I would. I felt I had been long-suffering and forbearing enough. He asked her to lunch and invited me to join them. I was working and declined, but he made sure it was a public place and they drove separate cars. Very nicely, he explained that he had met someone and was pursuing a relationship and that she would need to quit calling or sending things in the mail.

I will continue these thoughts in the next column. Long-suffering demands it. Don’t forget next Sunday, March 12, is time change Sunday.
[3-6-2017]

Brenda Cannon Henley can be reached at (409) 781-8788, or
[email protected].