By Brenda Cannon Henley
I included the short writing by Robert Browning that aptly illustrates the first concept we discussed in the previous two columns about aging gracefully. Several writers and those medical professionals that have given their lives to the study of geriatric matters all seem to concur that having a close friend, a husband or wife, a relative that gets you, a life partner, someone with whom you share your life, your goals, your successes and your failures is one of the most important factors to growing old well. I believe every article I have read, many quotes I have examined, and my own personal life experience points to isolation and stagnation as major detriments in being truly happy as the birthdays add up to higher numbers.

God himself told us in his word that it was not good for man to live alone, and so, he created for Adam a help mate, and he placed her in the garden with him. The old song says that people that need people are the luckiest people in the world. We may not realize that being alone in our homes or apartments for long periods of time without the communication of family or friends, or in some cases, our coworkers, creates a hard vacuum or deep void that leaves us sad, lacking, lonely, unfulfilled, and hurting.

It is often difficult for our elderly to admit to the younger generation that they truly miss them, or that they need their presence in their life. And young people, it may be just as difficult for you to be thoughtful, concerned, caring, considerate, and disciplined enough to carve out specific times to visit with parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers, neighbors who were good to you when you were growing up or they were coaching you in a sport that meant a lot to you at the time.

As you read these words, think of someone in your life that befriended or helped you. Make the time to call or email that person to check on them and to assure them you have not forgotten them or become too busy to care. You might make a much bigger impression than you could imagine and help to turn a blue, sad day into one that brings a smile to a tired face and worn body.

From my work with my church’s small study group, The Broken Pots, I have heard many times from staff members at care centers and rehabilitation homes, “Oh, I am so very glad your group came to visit Mr. Smith today. He never has visitors or gets mail and we always hope someone will come by to visit him.”

If you are a member of a group and you are looking for a truly worthy ministry that almost any member of your church or club could become involved in, consider regular, organized visitation in care centers, assisted living residences, or rehabilitation homes. Follow the rules and clear your visits with the administration of these homes. Never be pushy, arrogant, or condescending in any way. Wear a smile and be friendly.

COVID has limited some of our activities, but some homes are open and welcoming again. During the height of the virus, our group bought, made, and addressed over 450 greeting cards to the residents of four homes in our area. We also, every two weeks, saw that every shut in or member of our church no longer able to attend the services, received a beautiful greeting card, along with a personal note, small gift when applicable, and the assurance of our daily prayers.

I cannot recount how many recipients and family members of our friends have written or called my ladies to thank them for helping to brighten the hours and days for those who can no longer go and do as they once did. Ask your pastor or associate if you might initiate this ministry at your church or in your community.

If we turn our hearts and our thoughts toward growing old together, and helping one another, we can truly focus on the fact that the best is yet to be. Believe me when I write that old age will arrive on your door step more quickly than you can imagine, you best believe me. I am living proof.

Brenda Cannon Henley can be reached at 409 781 8788, or
[email protected]

[March-22-2021]