By Brenda Cannon Henley
One of the things I have noticed about getting older, and hopefully more mature, is that it doesn’t take the advanced population nearly as long to size up a person. It comes partly from having met and associated with a larger number of people in various situations, growing wiser in our own life, and our perhaps becoming a bit more mellow as we age. We no longer are firecracker ready to duke it out at the slightest provocation or perceived wrong.

My son is my pastor and I often hear him speak or teach three times a week. He is very good, by the way, and I probably should state for the record, I am prejudiced. He has always been a reader, a willing researcher, a lover of words, and humorous, but his best trait of all is that he genuinely loves people. His sermons are simply blessed by God in reaching the hearts of his hearers. He has seen many lives changed in his 27 years of active ministry and church leadership. We are currently in the midst of a four and one half million dollar building program in Pinellas Park, Florida.

I am taking some of the content from two of his sermons and putting my own spin on it. Brent, (Dr. John W. Stancil, my only son) was preaching an entirely different message, but a portion of his outline jived with some thoughts I had been toying with concerning an issue I had been observing and intending to use in a column.

Brent emphasized if we are to truly love God, we must truly love people. After all, Christ taught that is the greatest commandment. We are to love God with our whole heart, and furthermore, we are to love our neighbor as ourself. That is difficult and often nearly impossible. Some folks are just hard to love.

I recently met a woman that would fall into that category. No matter what others say or do, she questions it. I have personally heard her say on several occasions, “Now listen to me.” “Ssh, let me help you.” In front of other coworkers, she takes every opportunity to point out the inadequacies and faults, as she seems to see them, to whomever is present. She starts out, “While I was cleaning, filing, or whatever task she is assigned, I noticed you put this in the wrong place.” Or, I have observed her saying, with a direct look toward the owner, “I see that you don’t do whatever the way we do it.”

Sad thing about these observances is that six out of ten times, she has been wrong or incorrect. When procedures were checked with the owner, the original procedure was the preference. What makes a person act this way? Why do people over compensate? Don’t they realize they are not winning friends or influencing people in a positive manner?

My son used three words beginning with the letter “I” to illerrate his sermon, as ministers are prone to do. These were especially good. A person who is not demonstrating the “Love God – Love People” life before others may have personal issues with which they have not dealt.

I. Insecurity
II. Inability
III. Immaturity

It is possible that this type of individual feels very insecure or threatened around the more professional people that they, for whatever reason, are now around. Rather than ask for help or training, they try to point out faults and failures of others in an attempt to gain ground or advance.

They may truly not have the ability to perform the task(s) assigned to them so their offense is a strong defense which often comes across badly. It is a terrible position to be in and most often ends badly. Truth is best. Ask for the needed help and strive to be a team player.

Much of the game plan often implemented by a very rude person can be laid at the feet of immaturity. They just have not grown in needed areas. Hopefully, as they age, they grow and mature and learn how to best deal with other people.

God loves us all and it is in our best interest to learn to get along and work well with each other. The Love God – Love People plan is a good philosophy on which to lay the groundwork.

Brenda Cannon Henley can be reached at 409 781 8788, or
[email protected]

[April-19-2021]