By Brenda Cannon Henley
Gaslight or gaslighting are psychiatric terms taken originally from two movies, one released in 1940 and the other in 1944. Both of these movies were adaptations from a long-running, original English play, a definitive psychological suspense thriller by Patrick Hamilton. Additional titles for the play and movies are Gas Light, Angel Street, and The Murder on Thornton Street. The play was originally published in book form in 1939 and also entitled Gas Light. When the play hit Broadway, it ran successfully for three years, under the title Angel Street. George Cukor directed the 1944 version of the film. He also directed the successful Little Women, David Copperfield, and Camille. The film starred Ingrid Bergman, Charles Boyer, and Joseph Cotton, and garnered seven Academy Award nominations winning two of them. It was a lavish and glossy MGM film utilizing authentic Victorian-era production design noted for its attention to detail and integrity in recreating charming and realistic clothing and furnishings, as well as the structures. It was billed as “the strange story of an international criminal’s love for a great beauty,” and “the strange drama of a captive sweetheart.” Boyer provides a believable role as a diabolical, criminal husband who methodically attempts to torment, menace, and drive his bedeviled, fragile wife mad.

The term to “gaslight” a person (to deliberately drive someone insane by psychologically manipulating their environment and tricking them into believing that they are insane), was derived from these films and has been used since that time. Bergman won one of the Academy Awards for her portrayal of the tortured wife. Turns out that the wife was never truly crazy — her husband was just trying to make her believe that she was. How is someone able to do that to another human? “Gaslighting” is a form of emotional abuse wherein your partner manipulates your perception of reality and it takes place frequently in today’s world.

When a person is told consistently that something is normal, when in truth, it is not, they are being gaslighted. One might be told that they need to lie for the other and that if they loved them, they could do it easily because everyone else does it. A victim might be told that they are paranoid, too sensitive, or stressed out and that those facts are causing them to act strangely. A true victim might start to exhibit “crazy” or unusual behavior because of the undue pressure being put on them.

Victims start to mistrust their own perceptions. The gaslighter constantly tells his victim that what they are seeing, hearing and feeling isn’t really what they are seeing, hearing, or feeling. In time, the victim will begin to accept the gaslighter’s perceptions even though they do not seem true. They often lose the energy and will to fight off the constant attacks. A progression in the awful abuse is when the victim begins to feel as though their memory is terrible or askew. The following step is when the victim is convinced that partner’s memory has slipped because he says he does not remember specific things that have been told to him.

The victim will often resort to lying in order to avoid the mental abuse that will be forthcoming. The victim would rather tell a lie than to have to defend words or actions. The victim, as portrayed in the play and the movies, begins to really believe that just maybe they are truly insane, which is the gaslighter’s intention from the beginning. They think that there has to be something wrong with them that causes them to be fearful, overact, and question. Often one of the very worst consequences in being in such a relationship is a bout of deep depression. The victim is depressed, anxious, unsure, and hopeless. Confusion, lack of self worth, and disorientation drives one into depression.

If you recognize yourself or your relationship in any of these scenarios, take a hard look at your status in life, question your choices, and seek help in understanding why you feel these symptoms are happening to you. God wants His children to live happy lives and be able to contribute to society based on His gifts and desires. “Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherein one may edify (to build up) another.” (Romans 14:19)
Brenda Cannon Henley can be reached at (409) 781-8788 or at [email protected].

(published 8/12/2014)