By Brenda Cannon Henley
Questions come to my phone, my computer, and my tablet because I have written for a very long time here in Southeast Texas and even longer in Georgia and Tennessee. One of the questions I get most often has to do with judging others for their actions, or lack thereof, in many cases. Some people enjoy judging and really could make a good living out of it if they chose to do so in the legal field, but that would take more education, more discipline, and more hard work. It is far easier to just sit back in recliners or rockers and take on the world and let everyone that will listen know what others should do about their sorry lives. I am amazed at what ticks some folks off and how little it takes to get them ranting and raving for days over a perceived wrong or slight. Much of the time, the situation has little to do with them and they are not helping to remedy it in any way.

Judgment is a tightrope to walk — Many will tell you that the Bible tells Christians to judge or to make decisions about life choices for our families and us. If we did not make judgment calls, we would have no boundaries and would wander around aimlessly. If I did not judge what would hurt my children when they were younger, they would likely walk out into the street and be killed by a speeding automobile. If I had not judged what was good for them to eat, they could have died from being poisoned by something they chose. I am not referring to that type of judgment in this column. I am instead speaking of simply looking at another person and deciding what is right and what is wrong about them, and more than often than not, sharing that feeling we have conjured up with others.

Think about it — Have we cast judgment on another say within the past week? What were the circumstances that caused us to take this road? Something was posted concerning a theft at a home on a site where I am an administrator, and since we have over 7,500 members, there are a lot of different personalities. Immediately, one woman wrote that the lady who had endured the problem probably deserved it, or at least, that was the way it was taken by many of the members. Funny thing, the two women did not even know each other. This site member made a poor judgment call about something that was none of her business and it did not help matters. Putting it into print was a grievous mistake and many let her know it right away.

When we set out to judge another, let’s try to remember that we certainly do not know all that is going on in another’s life. We are most likely very ignorant of what is going on and therefore, unfit to judge. Perhaps we are expecting more than we should of a certain person or persons. We set the bar higher for others than we do for ourselves in many cases. To judge others makes me think that we are convinced that we are far better off than they are either in knowledge or position or power. No one is better than another. We make different life choices and we pay the price for the bad ones and gain from the good ones. Perhaps our exaggerated ego is involved. When we offer judgment, we are being ungrateful for our own blessings and we are certainly not being compassionate (Jude 22).

If we are judging and casting hurtful stones (often with our words), we are in a way rejecting anyone that is different from us. If we are objective and kind, we can learn from everyone we meet. In 99 percent of the situations, when we judge unmercifully, we are not helping to create positive change. We are usually driving those who are hurting, or who have a need, further away from help, friendship, and blessing. Is that our goal? Think about it — Wouldn’t we really want to be helpful and not hurtful?

“For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged, and with what measure you mete, it shall be measured to you again. And why see the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but consider not the beam that is in your own eye?” {Matthew 7:2,3)
[5-16-2016]

Brenda Cannon Henley can be reached at (409) 781-8788, or
[email protected].